Archive for the ‘Parenting’ Category

One Christian author pointed out that he believes many of the problems that children have today stem from the fact that some of them have never been disciplined or spanked for being bad. Thanks Dr. Spock. Not all children need spankings. Others of us needed it. Many active little boys often are put on drugs to calm them down instead of letting them work off their energy that God put into them. One drill sergeant put a 5 year old boy among his men and told them to do the same things the little boy did. Within short order, the men were worn out.

Babies – Savages

Some years ago the Minnesota Crime Commission released a statement more in line with what the Bible teaches about man’s basic nature (See Romans 3:10-23; Jeremiah 17:9). “Every baby starts life as a little savage. He is completely selfish, and self-centered. He wants what he wants when he wants it – his bottle, his mother’s attention, his playmate’s toys, his uncles’ watch. Deny him these once, and he seethes with rage and aggressiveness, which would be murderous were he not so helpless. He is, in fact, dirty. He has no morals, no knowledge, no skills. This means that all children – not just certain children – are born delinquent. If permitted to continue in the self-centered world of his infancy, given free reign to his impulsive actions, to satisfy his wants, every child would grow up a criminal – a thief, a killer, or a rapist.” http://www.family-times.net/illustration/Self-Centered/201632/

Discipline

Cliff Barrows, song leader of the Billy Graham Crusade ministry, tells a story about his children when they were younger. They had done something he had forbidden them to do. They were told if they did the same thing again they would have to be disciplined. When he returned from work and found that they hadn’t minded, his heart went out to them. “I just couldn’t discipline them,” he said.
Any loving father can understand Cliff’s dilemma. Most of us have been in the same position. He said, “Bobby and Bettie Ruth were very small. I called them into my room, took off my belt and then my shirt, with a bare back I knelt down at the bed. I made them both strap me with the belt ten times each. You should have heard the crying. From them, I mean. The crying was from them. They didn’t want to do it. But I told them the penalty had to be paid and so through their sobs and tears they did what I told them.”
“I smile when I remember the incident,” he said. “I must admit I wasn’t much of a hero. It hurt. I haven’t offered to do that again. It was a once-for-all sacrifice, I guess we could say, but I never had to spank those two children again, because they got the point. We kissed each other. And when it was over we prayed together.”
Taken from The Tale Of The Tardy Oxcart, Charles R. Swindoll, Word, pp. 543-544.

Jesus Took Our Place

In like manner, God has imposed some rules on us for our good. When they are violated, a penalty must be paid (Genesis 2:17; Romans 6:23). God could have maintained His justice if He sent all of us sinners to hell (See 2 Peter 2:4). But God the Father loved the people of this world (John 3:16). So God the Son volunteered (Hebrews 10:7) to come down to earth and become a real man by being born of the virgin, Mary (Isaiah 7:14; Matthew 1:23). He lived a sinless life for 33 years (Hebrews 4:15). Then, when His hour had come (John 2:4; 10:15-18; 18:12; 19:11), He allowed sinful men to take Him and crucify Him on a cruel and shameful cross (Philippians 2:8; See Psalm 22). While He was hanging there, God the Father placed your sins and mine on Jesus (Isaiah 53:6) He paid the debt that we owed to God (1 John 2:2) so we wouldn’t have to end up in the lake for fire to suffer forever with the devil and his angels/demons (Matthew 25:41, 46). Now that’s “Amazing Grace.”

While we might be able to identify with the physical pain that Cliff Burrows experienced as his children spanked him, it’s impossible for us to comprehend the suffering that Jesus experienced as He paid for our sins once and for all (Hebrews 10:10). His spiritual death (i. e. the separation from fellowship with His Father), from noon until 3 P.M., was far greater than His physical suffering on the cross (Psalm 22:1; Matthew 27:46).

The next time you think about engaging in a sinful act to gratify a temporary pleasure (Hebrews 11:2), read and think about the anguish and mourning of a man who got involved in an immoral relationship and learn from his failure (Proverbs 5; See 1 Corinthians 6:9-11; Revelation 21:8). If you’re a Christian, learn how to “Walk by means of the Spirit” (Galatians 5:16) so you don’t give in to immoral temptations and engage in other “works of the flesh” that are perversions of good things (Galatians 5:19-21). Think about the whipping that Jesus took for you so you wouldn’t have to be separated from Him forever? Trust in Him alone to save you, not in your good works (Ephesians 2:8, 9; Titus 3:5).

Scripture

“’My son, do not despise the chastening of the LORD, Nor be discouraged when you are rebuked by Him; For whom the LORD loves He chastens, And scourges every son whom He receives.’ If you endure chastening, God deals with you as with sons; for what son is there whom a father does not chasten? But if you are without chastening, of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate and not sons” (Hebrews 12:5-8 NKJV).

Please note King Solomon’s words carefully. Why? Apart from Jesus Christ, he was the wisest man who ever lived. “He who spares his rod hates his son, But he who loves him disciplines him promptly” (Proverbs 13:25). “Chasten your son while there is hope, And do not set your heart on his destruction” (Proverbs 19:18). “Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; The rod of correction will drive it far from him” (Proverbs 22:15). Do not withhold correction from a child, For if you beat him with a rod, he will not die, You shall beat him with a rod, And deliver his soul from hell” (Proverbs 23:14). “The rod and rebuke give wisdom, But a child left to himself brings shame to his mother” (Proverbs 29:15). “Correct your son, and he will give you rest; Yes, he will give delight to your soul” (Proverbs 29:17).

Rules

Are you, as a parent, making up senseless rules without careful consideration? Would you, as Cliff Barrows did, be willing to allow your children to spank you for violating the rules you had imposed on them? Are you sure your children know that you truly love them and have their best interest in mind? Are you being a parent like God Himself is? If not, what needs to change with His help (Philippians 4:13)? When will you begin to implement these things (James 4:17)?

Saved?

Are you sure that if you died today you would go immediately to heaven to be with God (1 John 5:13)? Why should He let you into His heaven (Ephesians 2:8, 9)? If you believe you’re saved, is there anything you could do or fail to do that would cause you to lose your salvation (Romans 8:35-39; John 10:28, 29)? If so, what would it be? Have you placed your faith in the Christ of the Scriptures who died for your sins…and rose again bodily from the dead? If not, why not do this right now (2 Corinthians 6:2)? Then let us know about it so we can help you begin to grow spiritually.

Contact

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“Calling Robert’s Bluff”*

Posted: November 30, 2016 in Gospel, Parenting

The Scriptures are clear. “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right…And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord” (Ephesians 6:1, 4).

“Take ‘Em Off.” Upon arrival for his dentist appointment, a rebellious ten-year-old named Robert refused to get in the patient chair and threatened to take off his clothes if the dentist made him sit. The dentist’s reply? “Son, take ’em off.” Robert did—and then, completely naked, settled into the chair and cooperated for the rest of his visit. When cavities had been drilled and filled, Robert said, “Give me my clothes now.” “I’m sorry,” the wily old dentist said. “Tell your mother that we’re going to keep your clothes tonight.”

Clothes. An embarrassed Robert was forced to walk in his birthday suit through a waiting room filled with snickering patients. The next day, Robert’s mother came to retrieve the clothes—and to thank the dentist. “Robert has been making unreasonable demands and blackmailing me about taking off his clothes in public for years,” she said. “You are the first person to call his bluff, Doctor, and the impact on Robert has been incredible!”

Boundaries. Children such as Robert need boundaries. If you don’t provide them, they’ll threaten and push until someone else does. If you are easily “blown over” in times of confrontation, your child will not learn to yield to authority. Not only will he later defy you, but he is likely to misunderstand the ultimate authority of God. The two sources of leadership, parental and divine, are directly linked in the minds of your kids.

Questions. Do you have a “Robert” in your home? Are you enforcing clear behavioral boundaries for your kids? Are you yourself obedient to the Lord and His Word? Are you a defiant parent who disregards God’s laws? Lawlessness is sin (1 John 3:4). It has severe consequences (Romans 6:23; Revelation 21:8). Do you know which part of the Bible is for you and which part is to you (2 Timothy 3:16, 17; Titus 1:9)? Have you placed your faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, who died for your sins…and rose again bodily on the third day? If not, you’re acting lawlessly toward God. What happens to those who won’t obey the Gospel (2 Thessalonians 1:8; John 3:18, 36)? How does God discipline His own children (Hebrews 12:5-11)? What can happen to God’s unruly children (1 Corinthians 11:30; James 5:19, 20; 1 John 5:16)?  Where do the devil’s children end up (Matthew 25:41, 46)?  Do you know the difference between our “potential years” and our “actual years”? “The Lord will judge His people. It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of a living God” (Hebrews 10:30, 31). “…it is appointed for men to die once, but after this judgment” (Hebrews 9:27).

PRAYER. Dear God, just as You gave us clear boundaries for living in the Scriptures, guide us to do the same for our children. And when they cross those boundaries, grant us courage and wisdom in our response. Amen.

Help. We’re here to assist those who are teachable and willing to change (2 Timothy 2:2, 15). We can be reached at 805-238-3549 or through our website: www.kelseypeach.com. If you have been helped from this article, please let us know and share it with others. To receive future articles a they come out, click on “Follow.”

Clear Gospel. http://www.cleargospel.org/wp-content/uploads/English-Display-Pkg-2014.pdf

Clear Gospel – Audio: http://www.duluthbible.org/the-gospel-audiobook/

*Adapted from Dr. James Dobson, http://www.crosswalk.com/devotionals/daily-devotions-for-parents-by-dr-james-dobson/dr-dobsons-parenting-devotional-dec-6.html