Archive for the ‘Divorce’ Category

In the classified section of the paper there was an ad that read: Wedding dress for sale, never worn. Will trade for .38 caliber pistol.

Billy Rose told a story about a man who, after twenty years of marriage, decided to divorce his wife. In preparing for the financial settlement, he began to rummage through his old checks. As he glanced through them, one after another stirred up memories of a long forgotten past. The check to the hotel where he and his wife had spent their honeymoon, the check for their first car, the check for the hospital bill for their first daughter’s birth, the check for the $2000 down payment on their first home.

As he continued looking, it all got a bit much for him, so he pushed all the paperwork aside and reached for the phone and called his wife. He told her that they had invested too much in each other just to throw it all away. Checkbooks often reveal where our treasure is.

This man inadvertently began to count the cost of dissolving his marriage, and losing not only his wife but faithful companion. Another article went on to list a number of other key areas of loss. For example divorce often meant loss of family, job, friends, church family and fellowship, finances, home, stability, health, etc.

In Malachi 2:10-16 we’re told that God hates divorce. If you’re thinking about it, please reconsider what God wants you to do. Breaking your vows to God, your spouse, and those that you made before others, will cause things not to go well with you.

Remember, the unity that exists between a Christian husband and wife is supposed to reflect the relationship between Christ and the Church (Ephesians 5:32). With God’s help, you can do what He wants you to do (Philippians 4:13; Ephesians 5:18-33; Galatians 5:16-25). Maybe honest confession and forgiveness need to take place (1 John 1:9; Proverbs 28:13; James 5:16; Ephesians 4:32).

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Sooner or later, you or someone you know, is going to need crutches. We fall, break our bones or have other things happen to us. Into each life some rain will fall and for some of you it will come in like a flood or tsunami. When it does, what will you do, and to whom or what will you turn for help?
Cancer.*  Most people fear this “C” word.  What would you do if your Doctor told you that you had cancer?  How did the Jewish King Hezekiah respond to his sentence of death (2 Kings 20:1-7). What did God do for him and what wicked son was born to him after his recovery from his illness (2 Kings 21:9)?
Death. It’s a general rule that all of us will face death sooner or later (Hebrews 9:27). There will be some exceptions (1 Corinthians 15:51 52)? When your loved one is taken in death, what will you do (1 Thessalonians 4:13)? Do you know what happens to believers and unbelievers at death (2 Corinthians 5:1-10; Luke 16:10-31)?
Bankruptcy. Perhaps you know of people who have worked hard and honestly all their lives to build up a business only to find out that a new technology has just made their business obsolete. Would you respond as Job did (Job 1:21)? Who owns your business – you or God?
Divorce. One of the most devastating blows comes to many marriages when one spouse tells the other person that he/she wants out of the marriage and that there is another person involved. What does God say about divorce (Malachi 2:16)?
Reaction.  How will you act and react when such things come into your life?  If you are a Christian, will you display the “Fruit of the Spirit” in your life for others to see (Galatians 5:22, 23)? Do you know how to get this fruit?
Crutches. Here are some crutches that people have used and still use in their time of need:
Escapism. Because of the intense pain, many people try to escape from reality by turning to drugs, alcohol, or by traveling to far away places (Jonah 1:10). But wherever they go, their problem follows them and they become frustrated in life. Have you ever thought about ending your life when the pressures seemed insurmountable? This is one of the most selfish things a person can do. God always makes a way of escape for His children (1 Corinthians 10:12). There is hope to those who call upon God (1 Corinthians 10:13; Ephesians 2:12).
Humanism. By turning to their friends or other worldly counselors whose lives may be also be in shambles, many people rush to the self help books and the philosophers of this world to seek advice. Blessed are those who don’t do this (Psalm 1:1; Colossians 2:8). All that a person needs for life and godliness is found in the Scriptures (2 Peter 1:3). But it must be studied carefully (2 Timothy 2:15).
Supernaturalism. Thinking that there might be answers in another dimension, some people seek out mediums or look into the occult for answers to their problems in life. King Saul did this and died for his disobedience (1 Samuel 28:7).
Cynicism. Bitterness and a preoccupation with their own problems will lead some people to seek revenge toward those whom they believe are the cause of their problems (Genesis 4:8; Romans 12:17-20; Hebrews 12:15). Many of them have an unforgiving spirit (2 Corinthians 2:7). They need to be reminded of the tremendous debt that Christ paid on their behalf (Ephesians 4:32). How could we not forgive those who seek our forgiveness?
Religion. Asceticism (torturing yourself or hiding out in a monastery) is the answer for others. Through self effort and good works (sacraments) they hope to find healing and forgiveness from God (Ephesians 2:9). But consider the Apostle Paul’s advice in 1 Timothy 4:3 and 1 Corinthians 5:10.
Scriptures. Believe it or not, the Scriptures (consisting of the 66 books of the Old and New Testaments) were given to mankind to inform us about the true and living God (John 17:3), and to show us how we can escape eternal condemnation and enter into His presence forever (Matthew 25:41, 46; John 14:1-3). When taken and interpreted as we would other pieces of literature, and discovering what sections are for us and which are to us (Titus 1:9), we will be enabled to find the answers to the mysteries of life and have peace in the midst of the storms of life (John 14:27; Philippians 4:6, 7).
Promises. Contrary to what some songs say, not every promise in the Bible is mine to claim. (Example: Genesis 17:1-8). But the Christian can count on God to be true to His promises in His time (James 1:17). How many of them do you know and claim? Do you try to put a timer of the trials that come your way? Do you give thanks for them while you’re in the trial (1 Thessalonians 5:18)? The challenges of life can and do have a way of conforming believers into the image of Christ (Romans 8:18, 28, 29).
Wait. God’s Word says, “Wait on the Lord; Be of good courage, And He shall strengthen your heart; Wait, I say, on the Lord!” – Psalm 27:1

Gospel.  If you’ve never placed your faith and trust in the Lord Jesus Christ alone, Who died for your sins…and rose again bodily from the dead on the third day, why not do so now?  This is your most important decision in life.

Growth.  Once you’ve done this, we’d like to have a part in your spiritual development.  We can be reached here or through our website:

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Material adapted from “Growing Deep In The Christian Life” by Charles Swindoll, pp. 53 ff

*Cancer And The Christian Life

“Getting married is sometimes referred to as “tying the knot” – a permanent knot instead of a slipknot. Marriage is supposed to bind a man and woman together in a permanent, loving relationship.  Ideally, marriage is supposed to last until death and not simply a divorce.” – James Dyet

Children.  Not everyone will get married and/or have children.  But every Christian can/should have spiritual children as he/she points other people to the Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ. The Apostle Andrew directed his brother Peter to the Lord (John 1:40-42).  He in turn led thousands to Christ for salvation (Acts 2:41).  The “Crown of Rejoicing” awaits those who lead others to Christ (1 Thessalonians 2:19, 20).  Have you ever led someone to Christ?  Would you like to do this and have a part in rescuing someone from hell to heaven?  Let us show you how you can do this.

  Joy.  While leading someone to Christ for salvation brings a lot of joy, and the “Crown of Rejoicing” (1 Thessalonians 2:19, 20), helping that same person grow spiritually brings even more joy (3 John 1:4). It will take time and a lot of patience but it’s worth the effort even as human parents experience in life.

Marriage.  It shouldn’t be entered into lightly.  We should take our vows seriously because God does.  A Christian should not marry an unbeliever and create an unequal yoke (2 Corinthians 6:14).  Both believers, planning to get married, should be “growing spiritually in the Lord” (2 Peter 3:18).

Considerations.  The Apostle Paul wanted those Christians who were planning to get married to consider “the present distress” and the fact that “the time to serve the Lord is short” (1 Corinthians 7:26, 29).

Widows.  Death breaks the bond of marriage (Romans 7:2).  A Christian widow or widower is free to remarry but she/he must do so only “in the Lord” (1 Corinthians 7:39).  Younger widows were encouraged to remarry (1 Timothy 5:14).

Honor God.  When Christians honor God in their marriage, they can enjoy some of the sweetest human relationships this side of heaven.  They also can demonstrate the relationship that will exist between Christ and His Bride, the Church (Ephesians 5:32, 33).

  Love.  When each believer seeks the highest well being of the other spouse, he/she is showing others what true “agape” love is all about (1 Corinthians 13).  This kind of love is available to all Christians who are “filled with the Spirit” (Ephesians 5:18; Galatians 5:22, 23).

Quote.  “Marriage is under the gun [today], but Christians ought to esteem marriage as a divine institution to be enjoyed and cultivated for human good and God’s glory.  They should regard marriage as a permanent bonding of two hearts and lives together in love and dedication.  When disagreements occur in a Christian couple’s marriage, they should agree to work through their disagreements respectfully and lovingly. When trials assail them, they should clasp hands tightly and pray tenaciously.  When the philosophy of the age tells them marriage is old fashioned, they should reply that it is not only old-fashioned but well-fashioned by the Creator.  Throughout married life a couple’s watchword should be, ‘Those whom God has joined together, let not man put asunder.’” – James Dyet

Questions.  How is your marriage?  Is it “on the rocks” or firmly “on the Rock – Christ Jesus”?  Jesus Christ, the God-man came to give us [eternal] life and abundant life (John 10:10).  He died for our sins and rose again bodily on the third day (1 Corinthians 15:3-8).  When we place our faith in Him exclusively He saves us eternally (Acts 16:31; 1 John 5:11-13).  We are not saved by our good works (Ephesians 2:8, 9; Titus 3:5).

  Help.  We’re here to assist those who are teachable, willing to change, and growWe can be reached here or through our website:

 The Bad News & Good News

If you or someone you know is thinking about getting a divorce from your spouse, please read this story first.

Vindictive Wife.  A lady went to see a lawyer about getting a divorce from her husband.  She said, “I want to hurt him all I can.” “In that case,” said the lawyer, “here’s what I advise you to do. Start showering him with compliments and affection. Make him the best meals you can. Always look your best. Treat him like a king. Then, when you have become indispensable to him and when you think that he loves you dearly start the divorce proceedings.”

Result.  Some months later the wife came back to see the lawyer to tell him that things were really going great. “Well, now is the time to start the divorce proceedings,” he said. “Divorce? No way!”  the woman said with a surprise in her voice. “Never, I love my husband dearly! You can’t believe how he has responded to me with kindness and love.

B.T.W. – An unsaved divorce lawyer probably wouldn’t give this advice to his client lest he lose money.  But we believe that a godly Christian lawyer should try doing something like this.  Strong Christian marriages and families are more important than “filthy lucre” (See Proverbs 1:19; 10:2; 22:1; 1 Timothy 3:3, 8; 1 Peter 5:2).  [1]

Christian Husbands.  God wants you to love your wife as Christ loves “His Body, the Church” (Ephesians 5:25-32) which becomes His future “Bride” at the time of the “Rapture” (John 14:1-3; Revelation 21:9 ff; 22:17).  He laid down His life for her and He wants you to be willing not only to lay down your life for your wife, but also to live for her advantage (1 John 3:16, 17).  “Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the [physically] weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered” (1 Peter 3:7).

God’s Desire.  He wants Christian husbands and wives to be different from the unsaved people of the world. We can’t change other people but we can change the way we act and react to them and to the circumstances that come into our lives.  “Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it.” – Chuck Swindoll

God’s Power.  If you know Jesus Christ as your personal Savior, God’s power is available to you to do the things He wants you to do in this life (Philippians 4:13). He wants others to learn about Christ’s relationship to the Church through Christian marriages. He has instructions for Christian husbands and wives in Ephesians 5:22-33; 1 Peter 3:1-7.  Read these verses prayerfully.

Not A Christian?  You might say, “I’m not a Christian but I’d like to become one so I can spend eternity with God in heaven rather than in hell with the devil and his angels/demons” (John 14:1-3; Matthew 25:41, 46).

Salvation.  To be saved you must Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ alone, Who died for your sins, and rose again bodily on the third day (Acts 16:31; 1 Corinthians 15:3-8).  We are NOT saved by our good works (Ephesians 2:8, 9; Titus 3:5).

Assurance.  A believer doesn’t have to just wish, hope, or think that he/she will get eternal life (God’s quality of life) sometime in the future.  When we believe in/on Him, we get it instantly (John 3:16, 18, 36; 5:24).  We can know for sure that we have it right now (See Romans 8:16; 1 John 5:23) because God’s Word and His promises are trustworthy (John 14:6; 17:17),

Help.  If you’re struggling and would like additional spiritual help, we’re here to assist those who are teachable, willing to change, and who want to grow spiritually.  We can be reached here or through our website:


[1]  For Christian Lawyers – The Importance Of Having A Good Reputation.